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Dec. 20th, 2022 12:14 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
scrottieStaying with my mother and I feel like an idiot for not realizing when I was staying with another friend, A, that this is exactly the same thing. I-bloody-dentical. It's been a long time since I've stayed with my mother but this hit me like a ton of bricks this morning, with her talking non-stop about the chore she was going to get up really early and do and calling all of her friends and telling them about the one chore she really really needs to, laundry, because she's completely out of clothes and can't go to her appointments unless she does that, and eventually managed to be distracted and talk about it for so long that she didn't do her laundry and then was late without having done it, 9 hours of flopping and fussing later.
She cannot stop herself from talking and then if you mention it, she'll deny that was talking... she doesn't even realize this avalanche of words are coming out of her face. She cannot stay on one subject. She bounces around. She's pretty good with the phone but cannot keep a computer operating and can't focus on one but is always trying to get another going for no good reason. She's often extremely socially inappropriate. She cannot pay attention to any task except after enough flailing she'll hyperfixate on a complicated task she wants to do. She's had countless stories of being in trouble and constantly screamed at in school and by parents for not paying attention or doing her activities or chores even though she was trying really, really hard to.
She buys food and then doesn't eat it, fails to eat with any consistency or at reasonable times, can't make sense of the food she has, and winds up just having weird snacks. Growing up, I was aware that my brother and I did a lot of the work of getting perishables organized and used but kind of always assumed that she could do that if she wasn't so busy and wanted to. But things really do become an invisible/confusing blur to her.
Every single conversation, you're telling her something, often something important, and she acknowledges it, but then starts saying something that indicates that it didn't register. You might have made a plan, or talked about how to do some task, or something, and you have it figured out, then seconds later, it like that conversation never happened, so you're constantly going, "LM, what did I just say?" or "we already talked about that... don't you remember what we figured out?".
I know you're not supposed to diagnose other people, but daaaamn.
Edit: She had an appointment at 1pm here but vanished while finally doing laundry and isn't answering her phone and hasn't made it back half an hour after the appointment started. I had to answer her door and entertain a healthcare worker while we tried to wait for her to appear or answer. Stuff like this happens all of the time.
Edit edit: She came back in about 38 minutes late for her appointment. I relayed that she missed the appointment and I had a card and she should call the person who might not be far away. She said okay, then started to tell me a story about something else completely that was in no way time sensitive.
She cannot stop herself from talking and then if you mention it, she'll deny that was talking... she doesn't even realize this avalanche of words are coming out of her face. She cannot stay on one subject. She bounces around. She's pretty good with the phone but cannot keep a computer operating and can't focus on one but is always trying to get another going for no good reason. She's often extremely socially inappropriate. She cannot pay attention to any task except after enough flailing she'll hyperfixate on a complicated task she wants to do. She's had countless stories of being in trouble and constantly screamed at in school and by parents for not paying attention or doing her activities or chores even though she was trying really, really hard to.
She buys food and then doesn't eat it, fails to eat with any consistency or at reasonable times, can't make sense of the food she has, and winds up just having weird snacks. Growing up, I was aware that my brother and I did a lot of the work of getting perishables organized and used but kind of always assumed that she could do that if she wasn't so busy and wanted to. But things really do become an invisible/confusing blur to her.
Every single conversation, you're telling her something, often something important, and she acknowledges it, but then starts saying something that indicates that it didn't register. You might have made a plan, or talked about how to do some task, or something, and you have it figured out, then seconds later, it like that conversation never happened, so you're constantly going, "LM, what did I just say?" or "we already talked about that... don't you remember what we figured out?".
I know you're not supposed to diagnose other people, but daaaamn.
Edit: She had an appointment at 1pm here but vanished while finally doing laundry and isn't answering her phone and hasn't made it back half an hour after the appointment started. I had to answer her door and entertain a healthcare worker while we tried to wait for her to appear or answer. Stuff like this happens all of the time.
Edit edit: She came back in about 38 minutes late for her appointment. I relayed that she missed the appointment and I had a card and she should call the person who might not be far away. She said okay, then started to tell me a story about something else completely that was in no way time sensitive.
